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Sunday, October 3, 2010

BRAINDEAD

Directed by Peter Jackson
Starring Timothy Balme, Diana Peñalver, Elizabeth Moody, Ian Watkin

Everytime I think about Peter Jackson's career pre-Heavenly Creatures, I laugh myself silly because who in their right minds would've EVER figured that the guy behind such gore classics as Bad Taste (1987), Meet The Feebles (1990) and Braindead (1992) would become the Oscar-winning helmer of the LOTR trilogy and other more "respectable" productions like The Lovely Bones and the remake of King Kong?! I wouldn't and to tell you the truth I personally prefer these over his new endeavors.

 Lionel (Balme) is a sissy mamma's boy who has a huge crush on the girl who works at his local corner store. Lionel's mother is a vicious old hag who submits him to her own will. Well wouldn't you know it, she gets bitten by a Sumatran rat-monkey (!!!) and starts spreading a disease around that turns everyone into a blood spewing and really very ill-mannered zombie. Lionel must now overcome the undead and let go the emotional grip of his dead mother.

 That sounds fucking crazy and that's exactly what the film is but in the most glorious way way over the top fashion. You seriously can't watch Braindead with a straight face because you'll either walk out on it with total disgust or you'll cheer and applaude and piss yourself laughing as I almost did. Braindead has been called the goriest film ever made and it very well could be just that. There's so much blood, guts and other disgusting shit that your brain is on the verge of rebooting from sheer disbelief. And let me remind you folks that I sincerely mean all of this as a good thing! Sometimes you need to blow off steam by watching classy films like Elizabeth and Quiz Show.. and.. sometimes you also need to go for other extreme and watch something so incomprehensible that you have to stand in awe and respect the celebration of chaos and brilliant madness. Besides how many films include a fucking ninja priest?! "I kick ass for the Lord!" Geez! After watching this The Lord Of The Ring can kiss my tubby ass.

KITEYTETTYNÄ SINIVALKOISILLE
Voi näitä goreklassikoita nuoruudesta. Ne lukijat jotka eivät ymmärrä mitä hauskaa tai nerokasta on verellä ja suolenpätkillä, eli lyhyesti ilmaistuna gorella mässäilyllä eivät tule tajuamaan tästä senkään vähän vertaa jota ovat tajunneet jostain Screamin tyyppisestä höyhensarjalaisesta. Me muut nostamme käden lippaan ja teemme kunniaa tälle kaikkien goreleffojen äidille ja ihmettelemme vain niin perkeleesti kuinka tällaisen taideteoksen ohjaaja on myöhemmin löytänyt tiensä Taru Sormusten Herrasta-trilogian maestroksi. Hilloa (siis verta eikä mitään helvetin bling blingiä!), oksennusta ja kaikkea muuta inhoa shittiä lentää ja koko sirkusta tuijottaa vähän väliä monttu auki ihmetyksestä että kuinka tällainen älyvapauden riemujuhla on koskaan saatu tehtyä. Sitä paitsi, monessako leffassa muistat nähneesi *ninjapappeja*?! En kaiketi voisi vähätellä enempää kun sanon ettei tämä leffa luultavasti uppoa tosikoihin.

Braindead at IMDb

The very cleaned up Braindead (aka Dead Alive) trailer..

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

taas ollaan samaa mieltä (:

EdWood said...

Hyvä niin ^_^