Monday, July 4, 2011
Directed by Lauri Nurkse
Starring Mikko Leppilampi, Antti Luusuaniemi, Pihla Viitala, Hennariikka Laaksola, Malla Malmivaara
Veijarit (internationally released as The Hustlers) is about two friends (Leppilampi and Luusuaniemi) who are womanizers and heavy nightclub hitters. Well wouldn't you know it, one of them falls for a sweet girl and what ensues is a broken bromance. I was personally really waiting for an outrageous comedy about two obnoxious men chasing tale in Helsinki in the wake of, say The Wedding Crashers. No. The film turns into a drama which goes down the same path we've seen countless times all the way to the ridiculously stupid ending. Shit, is it really that much of a gamble for these filmmakers to really go for it with the comedy? Everything always has to have such a dramatic edge it ruins the comedy aspect. Director Nurkse recently directed a decent TV crime series Tappajan Näköinen Mies (roughly translated Man Who Looks Like A Killer) and maybe that's what he ought to pursue next: a thriller. Because judging from this, before he grabs another lighter script, the man needs some practice.
Veijarit at IMDb
Directed by Ben Ketai
Starring Kiele Sanchez, Rhys Coiro, Diora Baird, Harold Perrineau, Mia Kirshner
Well, serves me right for having trust in a straight-to-DVD release. The first 30 Days Of Night (2007) film is still the best vampire film to come out since Blade II (2002) and it is powerful for all the reasons that have been forgotten in this joyless, by the numbers, numbing piece of shit sequel. The first film was genuinly disturbing and the vampires were more like mysterious savage animals than anything else. They didn't speak English but only their own language which made them even more distant from you and me and the film utilized effectively the fear for the unknown. In Dark Days they do speak English and resemble cheap Bond villains with their henchmen. The script has all the excitement of a roll of toilet paper, the cast is wall to wall amateurs (with one exception, what the fuck is Perrineau [HBO's "OZ", the Matrix sequels)] doing here? Is he really this hard up for cash?!), Ketai can't breathe life even to the simplest of action scenes and the sets are the usual factory floors and tunnels with endless piping running through them. David Slade, who directed the first 30 Days Of Night made even Twilight: Eclipse look decent. I'll bet my huge balls that no-one from this 92 minutes of boredom will ever pull of anything as admirable as that.
30 Days Of Night: Dark Days on suoraan DVD:lle tuotettu vitun paska jatko-osa vuoden 2007 hienolle vampyyrirainalle 30 Päivää Kaamosta. Ensimmäinen filmi oli aidosti ahdistava niin visuaalisesti kuin tehokkaan ohjauksensa ja uskottavien näyttelijäsuoritustensa ansiosta. Tämä dollarin kuvat silmissä toteutettu sontakasa on tehty penniä venytellen ja ilman yhtä ainuttakaan hyvää tai alkuperäistä ideaa. Käsikirjoitus on yhtä jännä kuin rulla paskapaperia, Ketain ohjaus ei saa eloa edes yksinkertaisimpiin toimintakohtauksiin, näyttelijät ovat TV:n Kylmästä Ringistä ja Lostista tuttua Perrineauta lukuunottamatta amatöörejä ja lavasteet ovat niitä tylsiä "pelottavia" tehdashalleja ja pimeitä käytäviä, joissa kiemurtelee loputtomasti putkistoja. Kuka on joskus päättänyt että tämä on katsojan mieltä stimuloiva ympäristö?!
The original 30 Days Of Night at IMDb
30 Days Of Night: Dark Days at IMDb
Friday, July 1, 2011
Directed by Michael Bay
Starring Shia LaBeouf, Rosie Huntington-Whiteley, John Turturro, Frances McDormand, Josh Duhamel, Tyrese Gibson, Patrick Dempsey, Alan Tyduk, John Malkovich, Ken Jeong, Julie White, Kevin Dunn, Glenn Morshower, Buzz Aldrin, (voices:) Peter Cullen, Leonard Nimoy, Hugo Weaving, Charles Adler, Frank Welker, Jess Harnell, James Remar
Well, time to bring on the wrath of thousands of die hard TF fans and declare this a successful trilogy throughout. Many would say that Bay couldn't direct traffic to save his life let alone good movies but in my opinion that's all how you look at it. And yes, there truly are different angles. You can't seriously win an argument against these films by comparing them to the likes of Pulp Fiction or Citizen Kane. Those films are art and hardly what you may call entertainment for a friday night. Transformers on the other hand is that kind of a film. And there really is no harm in that.
The third film in the series improves on the previous installments on the humor front which has always been Bay's Achilles heel. He's really into a kind of loud ghetto humor depicted in the first film by the usually quite irritating Anthony Anderson and in the first sequel by the fucking annoying Autobot Twins. In Dark Of the Moon much of the comedy rests on LaBeouf's comedic timing and physical comedy and luckily that's one thing he's very good at. Also Malkovich shines in a bit part as Witwicky's eccentric boss and Jeong from The Hangover fame manages to pull of his first role where I don't feel like punching him in the face. The first hour and a half is quite easy going and there's a surprisingly large amount of plot building which, in a tradition, culminates in to the last hour of almost non-stop action. The film owes much of it's gravitas to McDormand's presence. It's immediately a different ball game when she is on screen because her performance is very commanding and spot on for this movie. The effects are absolutely photoreal and the Academy will really make an ass of itself if the special effects statue doesn't finally come this way. Also, it's always an unforgettable experience to hear Cullen as the voice of my greatest hero, Optimus Prime but the addition of Nimoy as the voice of Sentinel Prime really finishes the geeky experince for myself and no doubt many others. Especially with all the fun Star Trek and Spock references. Then again, he's not a new commer to Transformers having voiced the character of Galvatron in the 1986 animated Transformers: The Movie.
People and especially fan boys just love to bitch about stuff and the geeky die hard fans of G(eneration)1 Transformers series must have been digging into their starting positions as the first film was announced. Yes, Optimus Prime trampled some flowers in the Witwicky backyard in the first film and everyone grabbed their torches and pitchforks. Shit, really?! You're gonna blacklist a whole film for one throw away joke? In that case the joke's on you, buddy. And the fact that they updated the designs of the characters? Well if you look at the whole thing objectively and stay true to what you'll find, it's a simple fact that they had to. If you would've simply transferred the medium on screen as it was in the 80's series, the whole thing would've looked fucking ridiculous and you wouldn't have been able to take any of it seriously. You fan boys know this, but can't admit to it. Then there's the whole international grudge thing against Michael Bay. Why? Okey, it's very fair to say the man is no Ingmar Bergman or Stanley Kubrick but then again no-one has ever claimed he was. Bay himself once said something along the lines of "I make films for 12 year old boys. Is that such a crime?" and I can't help but wonder the same myself. Once again, people love to complain when it's their turn or when they have the opportunity to do so. Pathetic. I'm sure there are objective people out there who honestly hate these adaptations of Transformers and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. But if it's because you just have lots of misguided random anger or you're just basically an egotistical prick or want to go with the flow and are afraid of standing out while you actually love these films, then you've got nothing. Fucking NOTHING. In fact, I believe most of the lame ass internet trashers haven't even seen all of these films or none of them but still love to fucking bitch and moan about how Michael Bay sucks balls and how he ruined their childhood memories. Fucking face the facts, adjust and deal with it, douchebags. Your complaints are not gonna stop Bay from making movies and by the way that's another fun fact.
KITEYTETTYNÄ SINIVALKOISILLE
Valmistautukaa nörttivuodatukseen. Transformers: Kuun Pimeä Puoli on lisää samaa kuin kaksi edellistäkin elokuvaa, sillä erolla että muutamat epäkohdat on saatu hiottua lopullisesti kondikseen. Huumori on ollut aina ohjaaja Bayn Akilleen kantapää, sillä mies on ollut tykästynyt ns. jenkkiläiseen ghettohuumoriin, joka pohjautuu lähinnä kovaan ääneen ja latteisiin epähauskoihin heittoihin. Ensimmäisessä leffassa edellä mainittua edusti Anthony Anderson (Me Kaksi & Irene, 8 Mile) ja ensimmäisessä jatko-osassa hölmöt ja todella ärsyttävävät Autobottien robottikaksoset. Nyt komiikka lepää pääasiassa LaBeoufin ajoituksen ja fyysisen komedian harteilla ja onneksi se on yksi osa-alue, jolla tämä mies loistaa. Ensimmäiset 1½ tuntia leffassa kasataan yllättävän eheää juonta ja tunnelmaa ennen kuin viimeinen tunti vietetäänkin jo näille filkoille tunnetusti miltei taukoamattoman toiminnan keskellä kun Chicagoa pistetään maan tasalle. Lisää tasapainoa vaakaan tuo etenkin McDormand sivuroolissaan ja yllättäen myös Greyn Anatomia-sarjasta tuttu Dempsey. Molemmat osoittavat kuinka paljon hienosti vedetty vakava roolityö tuo lisää arvoa tällaiseen viihde-elokuvaan.
Cullen on AINA koskettavaa kuulla oman suurimman lapsuuden sankarini, Optimus Primen äänenä, mutta tällä kertaa ääninäyttelijöistä löytyy myös yhtä legendaarinen Nimoy joka on varmasti suurelle yleisölle tuttu Star Trekin suippokorvaisena Spock-hahmona. Mies ei tosin ole uusi tulokas Transformersin maailmaan sillä hän antoi äänensä jo Galvatron-pahikselle vuoden 1986 animoidussa elokuvassa Transformers: The Movie. Olen kenties puolueellinen näitä leffoja kohtaan, oltuani fani jo lapsuudesta asti, mutta allekirjoittaneen mielestä Kuun Pimeä Puoli on suurelle yleisölle luultavasti ainakin viihdyttävä kokemus, jossa ei tylsyys ehdi iskeä. Etenkään miespuoleisille katsojille. Ohjaaja Bayn vihaajat tulevat vihaamaan tätäkin elokuvaa ja pilkunussija himofanit tulevat valittamaan ikuisesti formaatin päivittämisestä 80-luvun piirretystä nykypäivään, mutta totuus on ettei ilman näitä muutoksia koko projektista olisi saanut millään muotoa uskottavaa pakettia. Hyväksykää ja sopeutukaa tai olkaa katkeria ikuisesti. Ei oikeastaan kiinnosta.
Transformers: Dark Of The Moon at IMDb
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
Finally the long wait is over and Transformers: Dark Of The Moon opens in cinemas TODAY. I've been a huge Transformers fan ever since I was a kid and used to watch them at my grandma's house.
I for one have been very pleased with the work Michael Bay's done with these films. Lots of TF-fans (and especially of Generation 1 or G1 [= the first animated series from the 80's]) have been cursing Bay to the lowest levels of hell for his vision of Transformers but seriously people, you could not have made these films to fit the style of the 80's. The format had to be brought up to date and that meant redesigning some of the characters from head to toe. Granted, Megatron looks like a mess, but then again they did in my opinion preserve his attitude. Besides, these movies have the absolutely legendary Peter Cullen as the voice of the equally legendary Optimus Prime. That alone brings a joyous tear to my eye. One of my greatest hopes would be to meet Cullen someday. That man ROCKS!
I could go on and on but I have to start getting ready for the screenings. Yes, in plural because I'm going to see this film three times today at the premiere! Stupid? Maybe. Waste of money? Some may see it that way. Fun? Hell YES. Review will be online tomorrow at the latest.
Tänään odotus loppuu vihdoin ja viimein ja Transformers: Kuun Pimeä Puoli tulee ensi-iltaan! Olen fanittanut näitä kolisevia peltisankareita penskasta lähtien ja nämä Michael Bayn ohjaamat elokuvat ovat saaneet etenkin himofanien karvat pystyyn hävyttömän suorasukaisella viihdyttävyydellään ja formaatin päivityksillä 2000-luvulle, mutta itse olen rakastanut kahta ensimmäistä leffaa jo sen takia että lapsuuteni urheat sankarit ovat temmeltäneet samaan ja vauhdikkaampaankin sävyyn kankaalla. Sitä paitsi kyseessä on kumminkin 80-luvun piirrossarja. Ei sitä olisi voinut sellaisenaan tuoda valkokankaalle, sillä lopputulos olisi näyttänyt naurettavalta. Suurin ilo on ollut Peter Cullenin läsnäolo Optimus Primen äänenä, työssä jossa hän aloitti jo alkuperäisessä piirrossarjassa.
Tämä on kaikki toki helvetin nörttimäistä, mutta TF on se oma juttuni ja tänään odotus siis saadaan päätökseen ja käynkin edellisen osan tavoin katsomassa kolmosen kolme kertaa ensi-illassa, eli Tennispalatsissa saatetaan törmätä jos sinäkin lukija olet paikalla. Rahan tuhlausta? Varmasti jonkun mielestä. Typerää? Kenties. Hauskaa? Kyllä vain. Arvostelua tulee viimeistään huomenna.
Autobots, transform and roll out..!
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
Directed by Mike Leigh
Starring Jim Broadbent, Ruth Sheen, Lesley Manville, David Bradley, Oliver Maltman, Peter Wight, Imelda Staunton
Quite an interesting approach to do a film. Another Year is unconventional in terms of story telling in the sense that it doesn't have a real plot to speak of but what it does have in spades is a taste of real life and real emotions. Although the leading pair (Broadbent and Sheen) are the center of the film, the emotional core is Manville's unstable and extremely lonely Mary. There's a strong shared sense of shame for Mary at times and genuine sadness at others but it's not all squirming in your seat. Broadbent can do these kind of roles in his sleep and he and Sheen bring the film to a level of stability and like their house in the film, warmth. Another Year shows that life is joyous in the autumn years as well as long as you have good people around you to share the good things that come along. As well as the bad.
Another Year at IMDb
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
MTV Movie Awards 2011 - what the fucking hell was that all about?!
6 comments Posted by EdWood at 01:28In other case, welcome.
MTV (Music Television)
First off, CHANGE THE NAME OF YOUR FUCKING TV STATION!! Nowdays MTV has just as much to do with music as main stream rap with good taste or *gasp* an actual, meaningful political message (Public Enemy anyone?!)! MTV has become a breeding ground for superficial teens with it's fucking shit programs such as My Super Sweet 16 and Jersey Shore. Stupid, worthless and spoiled people who wanna be celebrities solely on the grounds of.. well.. they wanna be celebrities. Fuck you all. I hope all you douches get run over by semis. Twice. People with zero talent should have no business in the spotlight, much like Big Brother contestants. Sure MTV shows the occasional music video but what they're offering is very little and usually far from what constitutes as music.
The Movie Awards
I used to believe that these awards really were more important than the Oscars since the winners were voted by the movie going public and not by snobbish critics who also award films on political grounds and personal favors. I don't think so anymore. Thanks to Twilight. Now, I am aware that earlier on this very same blog, I reviewed The Twilight Saga: Eclipse to be an okay effort with three statues out of five. Three is not bad and while I stand by my opinion I simply cannot understand the voters anymore. Eclipse was a clear step up from the first two films which were fucking shit but that's still not much. And to award all the main categories to Eclipse was just too much. Robert Pattinson the Best Male performance of the year? You've got to be taking a piss! Kristen Stewart the Best Female. Mm-hmm. In some other films I could've understood this but in fucking Twilight?! And Best Fight. This really sent me over the edge. Among the other nominees were films like Inception with Joseph Gordon-Levitt's amazing fight sequence in shifting gravities and Kick-Ass. No, the winner is Eclipse. I'm just too angered out to write how truly frustrating and sad this is. Eclipse also took home Best Movie and Best Kiss. Right.You may wonder why am I making such a huge deal out of something as lame as the MTV Movie Awards but the answer is simple and justified: they didn't used to be shit. Only a few years ago you could count on there being taste in the outcome and execution and more importantly among the voters. Sure, your horse didn't always win but you still in most cases understood why the winner did deserve the popcorn trophy. That's all in the past now because I guess the former voters have grown up and don't have interest anymore and the next generation is only interested in superficiality. Why else would Twilight continue winning year after year? It's understandable but also very sad. Good thing there isn't a category for writing . If there was and Twilight won that, I'd have bombed the fucking building. Then again there's some reason already since the line "I want to get chocolate wasted" from Grown Ups was awarded as a Best Line From a Movie. Really?! That was it??!!! But enough about Justin Bieber.
The only good thing about the awards this year were the two awards that were given to Chloe Moretz for her work in Kick-Ass. She really created something inspirational and truly memorable and deserved to win Best Breakout Star and especially Biggest Badass Star.
Maybe next year I'll just read about the winners online instead of watching the fucking thing because I can somehow already predict the big winner. I don't even have to write it down, you're thinking the same name yourself as you're reading this.
Sama paska sinivalkoisille kiteytettynä
Jälleen on MTV:n leffagaala takana ja siinä missä aiemmin olen pitänyt näitä palkintoja omalla tavallaan korkeassa arvossa Oscareiden rinnalla (syystä että itse elokuvayleisö on ollut vallassa eikä puolueellinen akatemia), on tuo kaikki nyt nähtävästi enää hyvä muisto vain. Twilightin tultua mukaan areenalle on gaalan vähäkin uskottavuus ja myös valitettavasti sen vilpittömyys laskeneet kuin lehmän häntä. Liekö kiinni siitä että menneiden vuosien äänestäjät ovat varttuneet ulos moisista äänestyksistä vai MTV:n omasta musiikin ystäviä syrjivästä tosi-TV tarjonnasta, mutta jäljelle ovat pääosin tainneet jäädä uuden pississukupolven edustajat joille elokuvan laatu on yhtä paskan kanssa kunhan siinä on hyvännäköisiä ihmisiä. Kuka vitun talitintti oikeasti katsoo leffoja tällä kriteerillä?? Haluaisin sentään uskoa ettei kukaan katsele kyseistä Twilight-leffasarjaa sen luovan ja kauniin kirjoittamisen (sarkasmia [huomautetaan varmuuden vuoksi]) takia. Ymmärrän toki täysin ettei nuoret kenties vielä jaksa innostua leffoista kuten Kuninkaan Puhe, mutta Twilight?! Nyt oli ehdolla kumminkin myös Inception, The Social Network ja ainakin mahtavien näyttelijäsuoritusten hallitsema Black Swan, joiden kaikkien olisi luullut purevan nuorisoon ja jotka ovat aidosti hyviä filkkoja. Ei. Twilight sen olla pitää. Noh, te saatanan pinnalliset Edwardistit ja Jacobistit, saitte mitä tilasitte ja nyt saatte tukehtua siihen. Ensi vuonna varmaan taas lisää samaa tuubaa kun Breaking Dawn on väistämättä ehdolla. Voi kilin kellit. Kirsikkana kakun päällä Grown Ups-leffassa mongerrettu, korkeintaan myötähäpeää ja puhdasta vihaa herättävä "I want to get chocolate wasted" palkittiin vuoden iskevimpänä repliikkinä. Vittu.
Ainoa ilon aihe oli Chloe Moretzille myönnetyt pystit hänen mahtavasta työstään pienenä (ja mikä uskomattominta, *uskottavana*) supersankarina yhdessä vuoden parhaista ralleista, Kick-Ass. Vaikkei tämän mukaan kaikki oikeudenmukaisuus ole kuollut niin ensi vuonna taitaa tämä gaala mennä ohi ja ihmettelen vain tylsistyneenä käteeni nojaten voittajia joltain netin uutispalstalta. Sen verran paloi käpy pissiksiin tänään, mutta ei enää enempää Justin Bieberistä.
Thursday, June 2, 2011
Directed by Kenneth Branagh
Starring Chris Hemsworth, Natalie Portman, Tom Hiddleston, Anthony Hopkins, Stellan Skarsgård, Idris Elba, Kat Dennings, Colm Feore, Clark Gregg, Ray Stevenson, Rene Russo, Jaimie Alexander, Jeremy Renner, Samuel L. Jackson
Right off the bat I'll make it clear that I don't read comic books so if you are waiting for an in depth analysis on the differences and similarities of the film and it's source material, you'll be sorely disappointed. On the other hand I once again consider myself to be in a better position to review this film on it's own merits. Thor is part of the Marvel universe and it has been debated how it will stand next to it's equals in the upcoming The Avengers which will unite the Marvel heroes such as Iron Man (Robert Downey Jr), Hulk (Mark Ruffalo), Captain America (Chris Evans) and Hawkeye (Jeremy Renner who makes a cameo in this film). Thor after all is filled with supernatural powers whereas the others are or claim to be more realistic. Oh well, that's another movie and another day.
Thor (Hemsworth) is an alien (much like Superman I guess) who is stripped of his powers and banished to earth after he disobeys his father, King Odin (Hopkins). On earth he gradually grows into his destiny and must face off his scheeming brother Loki (fittingly slithering Hiddleston).Thor is full of action and high adventure and thus fully cashes in it's rightful place as monster summer fare. Director Branagh (who is likely better know as an actor from such films as Mary Shelley's Frankenstein (1994) which he also directed and The Boat That Rocked (2009)) may not've been the obvious choice to direct Thor but he has done fine work on it and the relatively new face Hemsworth (Star Trek and the upcoming Red Dawn remake) proves fully worthy of Thor's hammer so to speak. Very entertaining fare and please, stick around for the after credits sequence.
KITEYTETTYNÄ SINIVALKOISILLE
Thor kuuluu samaan Marvelin sarjakuvauniversumiin kuin Iron Man, Hulk ja Kapteeni Amerikka ja yksi syy tälle elokuvalle onkin ollut hahmon esittely ennen The Avengers-leffaa, joka tulee yhdistämään edellä mainitut hahmot samaan ralliin. Kapteeni Amerikan oma leffa saapuu teattereihin vielä tämän vuoden puolella. Kenties paremmin näyttelijänä tunnettu ohjaaja Branagh (Mary Shelley's Frankenstein, Merirosvoradio) ei kenties ole ollut se ilmiselvin vaihtoehto ohjaajan pallille etenkin kun mies on pääasiassa tähän saakka keskittynyt ohjaamaan Shakespeare-filmatisointeja, mutta hyvin leffa toimii silti ja toimintakohtauksissakin on juuri sellaista potkua kuin kesämätössä kuuluukin olla. Kohtalaisen uusi tuttavuus Hemsworth (Star Trek) suoriutuu nimikkoroolista kunnialla ja niin sanotusti osoittautuu Thorin vasaran arvoiseksi. Yllättävän arvostetulla sivuosakastilla (Hopkins, Skarsgård) varustettu Thor ei onneksi tunnu hätäisesti kasatulta esittelyltä vaan toimii oikein vilpittömästi juuri viihdearvonsa ja muuten niin mukarealististen supersankaritömistelyiden keskellä rehellisenä överifiktiona.
Thor at IMDb
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
Directed by Anders Engström
Starring Antti Reini, Outi Mäenpää, Ville Virtanen, Anu Sinisalo, Jasper Pääkkönen, Eppu Salminen, Ilkka Heiskanen, Mikko Leppilampi, Mikko Nousiainen, Maria Järvenhelmi, Iina Kuustonen, Svante Martin
Based on the book series by Reijo Mäki, these films (this being the third in the series with five (!) more to come) tell of the investigations by private detective Jussi Vares (Reini). This time he's called in to investigate a cold case of a murdered girl. What makes this film a special one is that it's the first in the series made by a completely new production team and new main cast. Previously played by Juha Veijonen, Vares is now a more serious man in the hands of Reini who (I'm sorry all you Veijonen purists out there) is a better actor than his predecessor. But it would be unfair to pin this film's success solely on Reini because crucially also Aleksi Mäkelä who directed the first two films has now stepped aside and the film is much more mature and serious in tone compared to the machismo bromance films Mäkelä is known for. Pahan Suudelma (internationally The Kiss Of Evil) was filmed back to back with some of the following installments and the local critics gave it hell for having the feel of a rushed product but I didn't get that feeling at all. Personally I prefer this film over the two previous pictures and am more eager to see the next ones thanks to Pahan Suudelma. A little tit bit (literally) for all you foreingers.. Katariina Souri who co-wrote this film and at least one of the upcoming sequels is actually Kata Kärkkäinen (or Karkkainen) and if you wanna see what Finnish screenwrites look(ed) like, just type "Kata Karkkainen playboy" in your seach engine and you'll find out. Happily so I might imagine.
Vares - Pahan Suudelma at IMDb
Vares - The Kiss Of Evil at Solar Films home page












